Paulanne Simmons Unscripted

Here’s to The Mucus Man

June 9, 2018:  Ask anyone for the funniest moment they’ve had in the theater and you’ll get a lot of different answers. Many scenes from Oscar Wilde’s The Importance of Being Earnest come to mind. Others may think of spoofs like Spamalot or The Producers. For me, the funniest moment came years ago at a student production.

Paulanne Simmons Unscripted

By: Paulanne Simmons

Let’s Talk About Intermissions

April 22, 2018 – Most of the time when the intermission is over, the house lights go off and the play resumes. But a while ago something unusual happened. Although the orchestra began playing, the lights stayed on as people filed back and found their seats.

Paulanne Simmons Unscripted

Theater and the Seamy Side of Life

Write a play about two middle-aged couples and a polyamorous co-worker (plus her two boyfriends) who welcome in the new year with an orgy.  End act one with one of the couples’ 17-year-old daughter surprising them en flagrant déit. Critics will hail the work for its penetrating insight. 

Paulanne Simmons Unscripted

Best Seats In The House

Orchestra seats. We all want them. And many of us are willing to pay top dollar to get them. However, it’s remarkable how a $200 seat can turn into a fiasco, making us long for a more modest place in the balcony. 


We all know what happens when a six-foot-three bruiser sits down in front of us.
Or how about when your next-door-neighbor takes up a seat and a half?

But size is not everything. Not at all.

Paulanne Simmons Unscripted

Hamilton 101 for the Mathematically Challenged

All those who suspected Hamilton, with it’s scarcity of tickets and huge prices for those who are lucky enough to get a ticket, is not exactly a show of the people, can now lay aside their fears. The show’s producers, in an effort to beat the scalpers at their own game, have kindly raised the box office price to a record $849 for premium seating to meet the price of those nefarious crooks. 

But there’s more good news.

Paulanne Simmons Unscripted

Whatever Happened to the Plot?

As far back as Aristotle, plot was recognized as an essential element of a play. Plot, according to Aristotle, consists of clearly defined problems the characters have to solve. This is also known as conflict. 

It used to be pretty easy to find the plot in a play. Hamlet has to figure out how to take revenge for his father’s death and kill Claudius. Tom has to find a way to extricate himself from his beloved sister with her glass menagerie and his mother with her idealized memories and her thwarted ambition. But nowadays it’s not so easy.

Paulanne Simmons Unscripted

                           It’s Not the Audience
Who goes to Broadway shows? According to The Broadway League, about 70% of Broadway tickets are sold to tourists. Twenty-one percent of these tourists are from countries other than
the United States.

Most of these visitors to New York City take in a show after a long day of ascending to the top of the Empire State Building, ferrying over to the Statue of Liberty and walking across the Brooklyn Bridge. In addition, international tourists may speak English as a second language. They are tired, footsore and a bit confused.

Paulanne Simmons Unscripted

                 Directors Who Dare

Years ago a well-known director (nameless here) told me that his was a “bullshit” profession. He pointed out that up until fairly recent times there were no directors. Playwright staged their own plays with the help of the cast.

None of this is to say directors do not and cannot make noteworthy contributions to a play. But, despite the recent glorification of directors such as Sam Mendes or John Tiffany, who make significant changes and original interpretations when plying their trade, they are not nearly as essential as the actors and the playwright.

Paulanne Simmons Unscripted

Theater Etiquette 2016

Once upon a time, going to the theater was an event. People dressed up, mostly because the well-heeled patrons were more interested in seeing each other than whatever was onstage. Even when people started paying more attention to the show, the tradition of putting on one’s best still prevailed.


Today, people attend theater dressed in whatever they find comfortable or (in their minds) fashionable. This includes shorts and torn jeans. But let’s face it, those torn jeans are still filling the seats.

Paulanne Simmons Unscripted

Thinking Critically     By: Paulanne Simmons

When asked, “What’s a critic’s job?” critic and scholar Martin Esslin responded, “A critic is a guide and a friend and a teacher.” That sounds pretty good, but the question remains, who is a critic guiding, befriending and teaching? Playwrights, actors and directors? Producers? Audiences?

Paulanne Simmons Unscripted

            Kindly Read This

In the past few years, I have noticed that more and more before a play starts a gentleman or lady stands in front of the audience and says, "We kindly ask you to turn off your phones,."

What on earth does this mean?

I did a little research and judging by the many synonyms for kindly, it seems these people are graciously, or thoughtfully or genially asking me to turn off the phone. I guess they must think there is really something special about the technique they use to ask me to press a button!

But further research cleared up the confusion. Kindly also means please, which accounts for the slowly disappearing but infinitely more correct, "We ask you to kindly turn of your cell phones."

All Is Calm: The Christmas Truce of 1914 *****

By: Paulanne Simmons

 December 3, 2018:  On December 7, 1914, Pope Benedict XV suggested a temporary hiatus of the war for the celebration of Christmas. The Germans agreed, but the British declined. However, during the Christmas season, spontaneous truces broke out all along the Western Front, as French, German and British troops crossed the line of battle to sing, exchange gifts and even engage in an impromptu game of soccer.

#realjoy ****

By: Paulanne Simmons

December 4, 2018:  Meg Flather and Lisa Viggiano first conceived of their show, #realjoy (at Don’t Tell Mama Dec. 2 and 30) as a way of getting rid of those pre-Christmas blues. But, inspired by Tracey Thorn’s “Joy,” their show really becomes a search for happiness and meaning in the midst of loss. With music director Tracy Stark at the piano, Flather and Viggiano perform a song list that goes well beyond traditional Christmas carols.